Have you ever apologized out of habit? I have. It wasn't even in an effort to be polite. Upon reviewing the situations after the fact, I realized that I often apologize to avoid a conflict. It's important to understand that there was no breach of etiquette. There were no harmful or hurtful words or actions, Regardless, subconsciously I figured that I was at fault so I automatically apologized.
Likely the other person didn't even register that I had apologized, but that tiny action caused my self esteem to take a bit of a beating. Apologizing for "nothing" told my brain that I was at fault (or worse... faulty)and that set me up for a potentially stressful fight or flight situation. Not a fun place to be!
So how do you stop this particular habit? Mindfulness. I have to simply start a new habit thus replacing the old habit with something that makes me happier and healthier.
Simply put, mindfulness is being aware of what you're doing and what's going on around you. When we practice mindfulness, we teach ourselves to limit the affect of things around us that snag our attention and distract us from what we're actually doing or saying. When we're mindful, we recognize that the apology that's about to pop out of our mouth may be unwarranted and we move on.
#apology #mindfulness #mylifedesignedByME